In relationships, there will always be moments when we hurt our partner. This is a part of it, it is inevitable. But what then?

Actually, this is very particular: on one side is the partner that hurt the other one, on the other side is the partner who feels wounded and hurt. On one hand, there is a partner who is afraid of saying sorry because they might be afraid of being rejected, on the other hand, there is a partner who is afraid that it will happen again.

But what about the solution? I don’t want to lie, this is not an easy handle. Many times, our partners have a huge reaction that we do not even understand, because we think that what happened was maybe not fortunate, but not that terrific in our point of view. There might have been some issues similar to what happened between you guys, that triggered a past pain and in that very moment, you partner might be unable to take a look at the situation from a neutral spot, they will focus a pain that was triggered in the past, and hold it against you, even though it is not your fault. So what we would recommend is for you guys to talk. Don’t run away. Don’t end relationships. Talk. Talk, until you understand. Listen to your partner’s true apologies and efforts to make it up.

Clear your own pain history and understand that what triggers you, is not always what happened with your partner, but sometimes a past event, that is still not healed. Take care of this first, before you make a decision.

And whatever your decision is, forgive anyways. Forgiveness is for you in the first place, you should not drink the poison that someone else is giving you.

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Lots of love,

Tina