SR Live Talk Part 8: Is it possible to know when your partner will listen?

This topic is related to last week’s topic, but we want to go a bit more into detail this time. Can I know when my partner is ok to listen to me, not only saying they are, but then focus on something else?

First of all, and again, however uncomfortable it sounds, you need to wait for a positive energy in your relationship, that arises from your partner. If your partner is grumpy, if your partner needs alone time, or wants to do something else, is on the run out of the door, this is not a good time to start a conversation, because obviously, they are not ready to listen.

On the other hand, if they are relaxed and easy-going, maybe even joking a bit around, that might be the time to go for it.

So how do you start this? I like to keep things simple, especially when it comes to relationships – so why not simply go ask them: honey, can you please listen to me for a moment? And then wait for the answer. Do not take silence for a yes. And do not start to talk without a reaction.

If the reaction is no, accept it. Simply say ok, that’s fine. Please let me know when you are ok listening to me for a moment. And then let it go.

Depending on your relationship and depending on how many of these talks you had lately, eventually your partner is not catching up on the topic with you on their own, so after a time, you go try again. And accept whatever the answer is.

This is important especially if the relationship has had some difficulties over the last time. You need to build up and show respect to make them listen to you again before you go for the talk, so you can be sure they are open and willing to listen to you.

Do you need some help?